


The Butterfly's Curse

by Cheshyhooks



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Butterfly Effect, Kinda Dark, Other, Sad, micronations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-07-06
Packaged: 2018-11-28 18:34:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11423748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cheshyhooks/pseuds/Cheshyhooks
Summary: If you've seen the movie the butterfly effect, it's exactly like that, so have fun.Wendy has a troubled past. It eventually leads to her brother's suicide. She's willing to do anything to get him back, even if it means going back in time and changing everything.





	The Butterfly's Curse

"Jett Kirkland, we have reason to believe your little sister has the same memory disorder as you. As you can see, her brain looks just like yours did at her age, and it appears she has the same blackouts that you did too. How long ago has it been since your last blackout?"  
"3 years, but, nothing happened and Wendy was visiting our brother Arthur at the time."  
"That's good, but it says here that your brother-"  
"Half brother. Different dads, Wendy's my only full sibling."  
"Your half brother Christen got in a car accident while you were visiting him, am I correct?"  
"My mother was there, she can tell you that I stayed at the house the whole time. Nothing happened, I can still take care of Wendy. I might be 17, but I can still do it! We don't need to go back to our mother!"  
"We don't doubt you, but we have reason to believe that these blackouts are caused by some form of emotional trauma. Now, we can't say that for sure, but there is evidence behind our speculations. Do you know if anything particularly traumatizing could have happened to your sister when she drew this picture?" The doctor held up Wendy's drawing of herself surrounded by a bunch of dead bodies.  
"No, I don't. She was at school, if something bad happened I would have been made aware of it."  
"Ok, but when we asked her about it, she said she had no memory of it ever happening."  
"I know, I've already spoken to her about it."  
"Hmm. Do you know if perhaps this is all genetic?"  
"I don't know. Our father's been in and out of asylums since I was a baby. The longest he's been out was long enough for Wendy to exist. So really, I don't know."  
"Ok, well, is your sister old enough to write yet?"  
"Yes. Are you going to have her keep journals like I did?"  
"Yes. They helped you regain your memories, didn't they?"  
"Yeah, but they weren't good."  
"Well maybe hers won't be as bad, but they still helped, right?"  
"Yeah, they did."  
"Then that's what she'll do."  
"Yes doctor. If you don't mind, I'm going to take her home now. I'll come to you if something like this happens again, ok?"  
"Ok. Be safe."  
Jett nodded.   
Wendy sat in her booster seat, kicking her legs lightly, "So what'd the doctors say?"  
Jett sighed, "They said you're like me."  
"That's good! I like you!" She smiled innocently, her 5 year old mind not understanding the full meaning of that statement.  
The following week, Jett had picked up an extra shift at work to make up for the lost time he spent taking his sister to their psychiatrist. He decided to drop her off at her friend Peter's house.  
"Sorry Jett, but Berwald and I have to go to a meeting soon. We'll be dropping Peter and Erland off at Ivan's house, I'm sure he wouldn't mind watching her too though!" Tino smiled innocently.  
"I can drop the three of them off. You and Berwald have fun at your meeting now."  
"Thanks Jett." Tino called his sons over and they excitedly got in the car with Jett. He dropped them off at Ivan's house.  
"Don't worry, I've got snacks and things for them to do."  
"Thank you Ivan, also, thank you for watching Wendy too. I know she kinda comes as a surprise. I can pay you!"  
"That won't be necessary. I love spending my time with children."  
"Thanks again." Jett turned to address Wendy, "I'll be back soon. Tino and Berwald should pick you up at around 7, then I'll pick you up from their place at 10, ok? Be good for them ok?"  
"Ok! Bye! I love you!" She hugged him one last time before he got in his car.  
"I love you too." He waved before leaving.  
She stood in Ivan's front yard and watched him leave. She didn't like it when he left, but he always came back for her.   
Ivan kneeled over to be at eye level with the 3 kids, "Hey, I've got an idea. How about we make a movie for your parents!"  
"Ok!" The children excitedly followed Ivan into his kitchen to write the script. It had no real plot line as most things written by kids go. It was about a time traveling dinosaur who wanted to start a band. Once they were done writing it out, Ivan got out his camera and began filming. They had a great time. Once they were done, they watched Ivan edit it and burn it onto two disks. The children were ecstatic and couldn't wait to show it to their parents.  
"Jett's gonna love this!" Wendy smiled widely.  
"Why don't you call him dad like you're supposed to?" Erland scoffed.  
"Jett's not my dad! He's my brother." Wendy rolled her eyes.  
Ivan laughed, "If Jett was her dad I'd be real concerned, he's only 17!"  
"Yeah! See! Ivan knows."  
"So who is your dad?" Peter asked, "And why don't you live with him instead?"  
"Jett said that our dad was crazy and that he and mom couldn't take care of us."  
"I've met your mom, and I gotta say, he's right. Your mom sucked with kids." Ivan snickered.  
Peter understood, "Mamma says that our real parents were bad too and that that's why we live with them."  
"See kids, it's normal not to live with your parents. Do you guys want dinner?" Ivan stood up, averting their attention away from their parents. It was successful and they eagerly got up and begged for food. He heated up some left over pizza for them. He eyed Wendy as she ate. After they were done, Ivan decided to make another movie with them.   
"We're going to be filming Peter Pan this time. Erland, you're going to be the the shadow, Peter and Wendy will be, well, Peter and Wendy." He lead them into his basement. He still had 2 hours until Tino and Berwald would be picking them up, "Alright, so this is the scene when Wendy gives Peter a kiss, but I've decided we'll change things up a bit."

Wendy blacked out and the next thing she knew, she was sitting in the front seat of Tino's car.  
"What's wrong kids? Did something happen?" He asked.  
Peter shrugged, "I don't want to talk about it."  
Erland scoffed, "Nothing mama. We're fine."  
"Wendy?" Tino asked.  
"I... I don't know. I blacked out." Her body hurt in places it hadn't before.  
"That's not good. We'll have to tell Jett when we see him later." The car got quiet again, "Come on kids. What happened? You're worrying me. Did something bad happen? You have to tell me if something bad happened."  
"I really don't know." Wendy sighed.   
Jett came to pick her up, "Hey Tino. Hope she behaved well for you and Ivan."  
"Yeah, Ivan said she was perfect, but listen, I think something bad happened to her and my boys while they were at Ivan's house. The boys won't talk about it, but Wendy says she doesn't remember. You said she's had memory problems before right? And you as well?"  
"Yes, we both get blackouts. That usually means something terrible happened. Oh god, is she ok?"  
"I hope so, but they refuse to tell me what happened."  
"Ok. I'll talk to her and it, maybe even get the physiatrist involved if it seems bad enough."  
He drove her home. It was late and she fell asleep in the car. Jett didn't mind picking her up and carrying her to her room. He set her down on her bed, took her shoes off and tucked her in. He sat by her side for an extra minute to reflect. These were her own blackouts, and would affect her later on once she learned how to go back. He knew that going back to fix things always had its faults and that nothing he didn't could make things better than they were, only worse. He'd tried, but his previous attempts were down right awful. There were some that resulted in Wendy never being born. This world was the best one he'd learned. In this one, he had been emancipated and had custody of his little sister. This world had its downsides too, his brother Christen had been paralyzed waist down in a car accident, their mother was a dead beat who thought her kids deserved to live on the streets, and their father had been permanently confined to an asylum. He wondered if he should tell her, but she was only 5 and probably wouldn't understand at that point. He'd wait until she was older.

Five years passed. Wendy sat besides Jett, both writing out journal entries while they ate their breakfast. It had become habit. Wendy didn't quite understand yet, but Jett told her it was important. He was 22 and had gotten a nursing license. It payed much better than his previous job. They still made frequent trips to their psychiatrist, but neither had any memory problems recently.   
Their dog sat underneath the table, happily chewing up her new bone that Wendy got her. Jett got her hoping that she'd help lessen any chance for another blackout, and so far she'd been doing her job.  
"I have to visit Christen today. He's in the hospital, they found cancer in his stomach."  
Wendy looked up, "That's terrible! Will he be ok?"  
"I don't know, that's what I have to go find out. Tino said he'd watch you today though, so be good for him, alright?"  
Wendy nodded.  
"That's a good girl, he'll be here to pick you up at ten, ok?"  
"Ok."   
Jett left the house at 9:30, just a few minutes before Tino arrived.  
"Hey Wendy. So, what would you like to do today? The boys were planning on hanging out with their friends Alex and Sebastian. If it's alright with them, maybe you can tag along."  
"Sure! That sounds fun." Over the past 5 years, she had become very close friends with Peter, Erland, Alex, and Sebastian. They were an inseparable group, even if Alex and Erland had anger issues and were kinda violent at times.  
Tino brought her to their house but she quickly left with Erland and Peter and took off to Alex's house.   
Sebastian was already there waiting for them, "Aw cool, you brought~a Wendy."  
Alex looked up and smiled, "Hey guys! You'll never believe what I found!" He handed them a stick of dynamite.  
Erland took it excitedly, "Whoa! Where'd you find it?"  
"My dad was visiting Ivan, so I snuck into the basement to see what kind of cool shit I'd find, sure enough after digging through all that porn I found this baby." Alex looked pretty proud of himself.  
Peter and Sebastian were naturally a bit nervous about this.  
"Don't you~a think this is a bit dangerous? Someone could get~a hurt."   
"Relax, Alex is right! This will be fun! Don't you agree Wendy?" Erland glanced over to Wendy.  
"I don't know. It would go off to fast, don't you think?"  
"We can put a cigarette on it or something, that'd give us plenty of time!" Alex stated.  
He and Erland lead them to a house, "This one."  
"Isn't this Niko's house?" Peter asked.  
"Don't worry, it'll be fine. Niko's our friend. He wouldn't mind if we blew up his mailbox." Erland scoffed.  
Alex handed the dynamite to Peter, "Here, since you're so scared, you do it!" He took out a cigarette and lit it before placing it on. Peter did as he was instructed to. He quickly ran back to his friends who all hid in a bush.  
Wendy could feel her heart racing, which made her concerned for Sebastian who was asthmatic. She felt Sebastian cover her ears as they waited.  
Niko stepped outside, holding his infant son in his arms. He slowly made his way to the mailbox and opened the lid to see what they had put inside. Wendy felt her heart sink immediately. She instantly blacked out.

They were running through the woods behind the neighborhood. Sebastian stopped for a moment to cough. He felt like passing out and couldn't breathe. Wendy stopped to help him.  
"Sebastian! Are you ok? What just happened?!" She looked up to the other three anxiously.   
"What do you think?! Now come on, we gotta get away from here!" Alex shouted.  
"No! What we got to do is help Sebastian! He's having an asthma attack!" Wendy snapped.  
"She's right! We have to get Sebastian home!" Peter ran up besides Sebastian and helped him up.   
"You can't tell anyone about what happened! If you do, I'll... I'll kill Jett and Tino!" Erland threatened.  
They rushed him home. Luckily Sebastian's brothers were home and were able to get him to the hospital. Alex split and went home. Peter, Erland, and Wendy sat on Tino's porch while Tino and Berwald freaked out over the recent events. Wendy had no clue what they were talking about when Tino mentioned a dead neighbor.  
Jett came back sooner than Wendy had anticipated, "Wendy! Are you okay?" He got out of his car and ran up to see her, "I heard there was and explosion just down the street, and heard Sebastian's in the hospital! What happened?"  
"I don't know! I wish I did, but I don't remember! I blacked out!" She got up to hug her brother.   
He hugged her back, "I know how that feels. It'll be ok, we'll visit the physiatrist and we'll make sure you write down everything in your journals."  
Wendy nodded.

Two years passed. Jett sat alone at the kitchen table with a bottle of whiskey late at night. Wendy had gotten up because she heard a noise in the kitchen. She sighed and sat down at the table next to him.  
"One of them nights again huh?"  
He nodded somberly and wiped his face off, "Sorry you had to see me like this kiddo. Why're you up? You ok?"  
"I'm fine, but are you?"  
"I guess I'm just going through a bit of a rough patch, but I'll be fine. Just something that needs to happen I guess. Without the bad times how do you even know if the good ones are really good or not?"  
"Jett, what happened?"  
"I had another black out. After ten years I thought I was fine, no more blackouts, and yet it seems life still has more hell to throw at me."  
"Who's to say that what happens during the black outs is all bad?"  
"I just know Wendy! I've been able to go back a few times, but only bad things happened, even when I tried to make things better."  
Wendy wanted to say more, but she blacked out.

She found herself next to Jett. The time on the clock told her that several hours had passed. Jett sat still looking as depressed as ever with his whiskey almost all gone.  
"I'm assuming you're back to normal now?"  
Wendy looked up to see him, "So you know?"  
"That you just blacked out? Yes. Of course. You just kinda sounded different. Besides, I get them too. I know what it's like. You should probably get back to bed kiddo. I'll see you in the morning."  
"Goodnight."  
"Goodnight." Jett finished with the rest of the bottle.  
  
One year later, Wendy, Peter, and Sebastian decided to take a walk through the woods. Alex was in juvie, and Erland had been scaring them all recently so they decided to avoid spending time with him, which of course made him scarier. Wendy had found him in rummaging around in her room one night, looking through her journals.   
"Hey~a, look, smoke." Sebastian pointed to the sky.  
"Where's it coming from?"  
"Let's go find out!" Wendy smiled, dragging her two friends along with her.   
Erland stood in front of a small fire with a fairly large bag besides him. The bag was moving and barking furiously. He looked back with a monotone expression, "Hello, friends."  
"Erland! What are you doing?!" Wendy tried running at him, but Sebastian held her back.  
"What do you think? I read your little journals, found that thing you wrote about the time we blew up Niko and his son. I told you I'd kill someone if you told anyone, but since you didn't explicitly tell anyone, I figured killing your dog would get the message across just as easily though."   
"This is going too far!" Peter retorted.  
Erland rolled his eyes and picked up a baseball bat. He ran up to his brother and smacked him upside the head with it, "Look what you made me do Wendy. I didn't want to hurt him!"  
Sebastian ran up to the dog and tried untying the bag, but Erland swung his bat and smacked it up against Sebastian's jaw. A loud snapping sound was heard. Wendy ran up to him and tried to rip the bat from his hands, but her mind was failing her and she blacked out.

She sat up, an alarming amount of pain in her abdomen as she sat up. The still burning ashes of her dog confirmed the worst. Peter sat beside her, blood caked to the side of his face.   
Sebastian stood in front of the dog's burning corpse, "I'm~a so sorry Wendy. I~a tried to stop him! I really did!"  
"That's enough. I'm going home." She got up, pain swarming her body as she did, and walked away.   
She opened her front door, Jett immediately approached her with a smile, "Welcome home Wendy!" He saw the look on her face, "Oh no! What's wrong? Are you hurt? What happened?"  
She sat down on the floor and began crying. Jett sat down next to her and held her in his arms, giving her time to let it out.   
After finding out what happened, Jett decided it was time to move. He couldn't stand the town anymore, his neighbors had been blown up, his sister raped, and his dog killed. He couldn't stand it. He had to leave before things could get worse. They packed up their things into a moving van. Wendy was a bit upset, but knew it was all for the best.   
The van drove away, and in the rear view mirror, Wendy could see Sebastian and Peter standing in the distance. She wanted to say one last little thing to them, but was scared to. She blacked out.   
  
She was still in the van with Jett. They were moving to a place 4 hours away.  
"Hey, if you want, you can read through my journals once we get to our new home. I understand how hard this can be for you." Jett smiled weakly.  
"Thanks, I'll make sure to. You can read mine too if you want."  
"Cool." He sighed, "So, do you think you'll ever go back to visit them when you're older?"  
"I don't know. Probably not. A lot's happened and I don't think the blackouts were accidental."  
"You're right on that one. They're the moments of your life you know you'll want to go back to, even if it's just to spectate. Change one thing, change everything. Don't risk it. Bad things may have happened, but you should try to see this as our chance to start over."  
Wendy inhaled deeply, "You're right. I shouldn't dwell on it."

 

Wendy worked evenings alongside her brother. She'd only been an LPN for a few months, but really liked it. She was 22, Jett was 34. The two were still roommates but in all honesty they didn't care. They liked living together, Jett had worked hard just to have her live with him in the first place. She didn't want to go through the trouble of finding another place to live while being perfectly content with where she was. The two had a day off together and decided to go do something fun.  
"How about we visit that old crazy lady down the street?" Jett asked.  
"The wannabe psychic? Why not?"  
Jett smiled wildly, "Then let's go!"  
The two made their way over. She looked up at them with a smile, "Welcome, may I have your names please?" Her eyes were pure white.  
"Jett Kirkland, and this is my little sister Wendy."  
"Please, sit." She instructed.  
They did, and Wendy placed a 50 in her bowl of money. The woman reached up and touched their hands, "This is odd, you don't have a destiny... You have no souls, you were never supposed to exist. You can only cause heart ache." She scooted back.   
"This is bullshit." Jett got up and stormed out.   
"I'm sorry about him." Wendy got up to follow him, "Jett, wait!"  
"No, this always happens! They never tell me I chose the right path!"  
"What do you mean?"  
"Change one thing, change everything! Just when I think everything is fine, I hear shit like that! Sure, I've gone back and fucked shit up! That's why Peter didn't live with His father, why Christen is dead now, why Mom didn't want you! Because I have no set in stone place to go, and because every time I try to fix things, they just get worse!"  
"Hey, listen, things aren't bad now are they? We have a roof over our heads, we're financially stable, we're comfortable, what more could we need?"  
"No! Things aren't ok! I fucked up! I failed you! But I can't go back and fix it! No, but you can go back, then let's see how much better things get! They never do, it always only gets worse!"  
"Jett, you told me it was too risky to go back and try to fix things, so why would I?"  
He was quiet for a moment, "Remember that time you blacked out while talking to me one night?"  
"Yes, why?"  
"Sometimes I wonder what would happen if you said something different."  
They walked the rest of the way home in silence. When they got home, Jett hauled himself up in his room, not responding to Wendy when she asked if he was ok.  
The next day, Wendy knocked on his door to wake him up for work. He didn't respond. She decided to call him in.   
She got home from work and noticed that he still hadn't left his room. She sighed and took out her spare key to his room, "I know this an invasion of your privacy, but you're seriously worrying me, so I'm coming in." She pushed the door open.   
He'd used one of the boards on the ceiling to hang himself. Wendy felt taken aback by this. She covered her mouth and tried to suppress her tears. She felt betrayed in every which way. How could he do this to her? Why would he do this to her?

Everything was quiet. When she closed her eyes she could have probably be able to picture something very tranquil and soothing. The silence was welcomed, but the rain sweetened the deal. The soft rain smells, the calming pitter patter of the falling droplets, yes, everything seemed very peaceful. It could help her forget that she was burying someone. She could hear some sniffles from the people around her. It was odd. She felt very much inclined with the man they buried. He'd raised her for Christ's sake. She wasn't sure how to feel. The expression on his face was so peaceful, and relaxed. She wondered if that just meant that we were supposed to feel the same, but the tears that forced their way through betrayed that thought.   
She remembered what he said about going back, how if she changed one little thing she could change everything. He'd often told her it was dangerous, and that things always change for the worst, but she had to give it a try. She needed to get her brother back.   
After the funeral, she went home and found her old journals. Jett had marked all of the times she had a blackout, she wondered if he foresaw this. She flipped one open, it was the time she had been raped by Ivan. She thought about it for a moment, how would changing that bring her brother back? She wasn't entirely sure, so she gave it a try.  
"Yesterday, Ivan baby sat Peter, me, and Erland. He made a movie with us, but then he wanted to make another." She could feel the world around her begin to shake, but kept reading regardless, "He told us to go to the basement and take off our clothes." She looked up as the world around her changed.   
  
She was five years old again, in Ivan's basement.   
"Alright, so this is the scene when Wendy gives Peter a kiss, but I've decided we'll change things up a bit." Ivan adjusted his camera a bit, "Wendy, I want you to take off your clothes."  
"No. Why should I? So you can make your illegal little kiddie porn? Of course not fuck tard!" She hissed.  
"Wendy, do you want me to tell Jett about what a little shit you've been?"  
"Do you want me to tell Jett about all this? He may only be 17 now, but trust me, you don't want sex offender on your permanent record." She sneered.   
Ivan stood there with a loss of words.  
"Now, unless you'd like the authorities involved, don't touch Peter, Erland, or me ever again!"   
Peter looked up at her, a sense of inspiration in his eyes.  
She felt the word around her begin to fade again.

She was in someone's bed, though, she didn't know who's. She looked around, it looked like her room with only a few minor changes. She felt a warm hand reach up and gently caress her side.  
"Go back to sleep Wendy. It's too early to be up." A soft masculine voice called out to her.  
Wendy looked back and saw a blonde man beside her, not to mention she wasn't wearing any clothes. She jumped up, utterly confused and startled, "Who are you?"  
He sat up, rubbing his eyes, "It's Peter, your husband."  
She stared at him. Husband? She could have sworn she was a lesbian though. Perhaps she was just bi? She wasn't really sure what to think. She got up and looked for some clothes and went to the bathroom to shower and think about everything for a moment.  
The new memories hit her like a truck. Images of she and Peter hanging out a lot, the murder of Niko and his son, the burning of her dog, Erland getting brought down by the police, she and Jett moving, Peter visiting a lot, and lastly Jett being there for her wedding.   
After her shower she decided to check up on Peter, "Hey, do we um...do we have any plans for today?"  
"No. Not really. Neither of us work today. Thought we'd just chill."  
"You wouldn't mind if I visited Jett today, would you?"  
"Not at all. Oh, honey, your nose is bleeding."  
She reached up and sure enough, there was blood on her face, "Oh." She left to clean her face off.  
She skimmed through her journals to see what else had changed in her life. Apparently Jett was married now. Luckily she had his address and phone number, so she decided to call Jett. She wanted to know immediately if he was ok.  
"Jett? Hey it's Wendy, just checking in with ya, I was wondering if I could come over today."  
<Sure. Why not. It's been a while since you've visited.>  
She wasn't too sure if she liked everything this new life had to give her, but she liked most of it. She glanced down and noticed that her stomach was a lot larger than it had been last time loop, but it wasn't that bad. Just a little odd. She kinda looked pregnant.  
Peter tagged along on her little trip to see her brother, claiming that she was in no condition to drive.  
"What do you mean by that? Why wouldn't I be able to drive?"  
"Come on honey, just let me drive ok?"  
"Fine." His driving was far better than Jett's. She thought about it some more and realized he was probably self taught for the most part. He was trying to emancipate himself the day he turned 16 after all, and surprisingly enough succeeded.   
They got to Jett's house. It was bigger than the one she shared with him. Regardless though, she knocked on the door. She and Peter were greeted by a blonde man with a thick French accent.   
"Morning Francis, how've you been?" Peter smiled sweetly.  
"Peter, Wendy, it's simply been too long. Please, come inside."  
Their house was absolutely gorgeous. Wendy knew his husband had to have decorated, Jett didn't have much of an eye for making things pretty. She sat down on a couch beside Peter. Jett came out of one of the rooms and smiled widely.  
"Wendy! Long time no see! So, how's the little bundle of joy doing? Far along enough to tell if it's a boy or girl yet?" He sat down next to her and gave her a hug.  
"What?" She looked down at her stomach, quickly realizing what he meant.   
Peter giggled softly, "It's a boy! We were thinking about either Arthur or Christen."  
"You should definitely go with Christen." Jett smirked.   
Wendy felt weird, like she was living in some other person's life. She felt no romantic attraction to anyone, she had made it a point in her life to do everything for her brother, but that just wasn't the case here. Her brother was self sufficient, he was married even. She was married, going to have a kid. She didn't like it, but at least her brother was alive and happy. That was all that mattered right?  
They spent a few hours together. Wendy got to know Francis, and was happy that Jett had found someone to love. She found it nice to hang out with Peter again, even if it was on far different circumstances than what she originally wanted. Eventually, she and Peter had to go home.  
The following morning, their car had been beat up.  
"What happened? Who did this?" She worriedly glanced over to Peter.  
"I'm sorry, I never told you." He brought her inside, "It was Erland. He got out of jail. I should have told you, I'm sorry. Don't worry though, I won't let him hurt you. Not like last time." He protectively hugged her.  
"You'll protect her you say." A strange yet familiar voice boomed from behind them.   
Peter whipped around, "Erland! Why are you here?!"  
"You know why."  
Wendy remembered. Tino and Berwald were never concerned about the well being of their sons while they were with Ivan. He never laid a finger on Peter, but Erland however was a different story. Peter had become too much of a loud mouth for Ivan's tastes. Erland's actions when he lit her dog on fire made more sense to her now.   
Erland and Peter began fighting, but Erland had experience and was stronger than his brother.   
"Look Wendy. I don't want to kill you husband, but I might just have to." He glared at her, the sheer amount of malice in is eyes frightened her, "But I have to kill my nephew first."  
Wendy covered her stomach protectively and ran out of the room. She had to fix this, she had to go back and make things right. Erland had managed to get a few swings at her before she locked herself in her room. She flipped open one of her journals. It wasn't the exact event that she wanted, but it would have to do, change one thing change everything, right?  
"There was smoke in the air that had caught our attention." Erland broke a small hole in the wall, but Wendy's world had already begun shaking, "The amount of fear that I felt when I realized that it had been my dog in his bag was overwhelming!" The world faded and a rush of relief pulsed it's way through Wendy, even if it was momentary.

She was 13 again. She looked up at the sky, "Sebastian, you need to find something sharp to cut open the bag with!"  
Sebastian nodded, not fully understanding why she was so concerned, but it seemed pretty damn urgent to her so he complied.  
After Sebastian found a sharp blade of broken metal, they ran up to confront Erland.  
Erland stood in front of a small fire with a fairly large bag besides him. The bag was moving and barking furiously. He looked back with a monotone expression, "Hello, friends."  
"Erland! What are you doing? Let Sydney go!" Wendy felt a great deal of stress, but stood her ground.   
"What do you think? I read your little journals, found that thing you wrote about the time we blew up Niko and his son. I told you I'd kill someone if you told anyone, but since you didn't explicitly tell anyone, I figured killing your dog would get the message across just as easily though."   
"This is going too far!" Peter retorted.  
Erland rolled his eyes and picked up a baseball bat. He ran up to his brother and smacked him upside the head with it, "Look what you made me do Wendy. I didn't want to hurt him!"  
Sebastian ran up to the dog and tried cutting the dog free, but Erland swung his bat and smacked it up against Sebastian's jaw. A loud snapping sound was heard.   
"Erland! You don't have to do this? What'll become of you if you let this happen? Is this what you wanted? A life of jail time?"  
"No! I just want you to keep your damn promises, and for you to stop fucking shit up for everyone!"  
"Jett reads my journals, but he didn't tell anyone about what we did to Niko and his son! I understand that you feel hurt and betrayed, but is all of this really necessary? How will this make you feel better?!"  
"I just wanted Peter to look up to me the way he does to you!"  
"And this is what's gonna do that?"  
Erland stopped for a moment, "No."  
"Here, we can help you, you're still our friend." Wendy stretched out a hand. Erland hesitantly reached out too.  
Sebastian sat up, his jaw a broken bloody mess. He looked up to see Erland step closer to Wendy. Instinctively he got up, taking the sharp metal blade with him, and he dug it into Erland's neck. He couldn't let Erland hurt Wendy too.  
"Sebastian! What have you done?!" Wendy stared up at him, but it was too late and the word began to fade away.

 

Wendy checked her surroundings. She was at the house she shared with Jett. She anxiously got up to see if Jett was nearby.   
"Jett! Are you ok?" She ran up to her brother with a tight hug, "I was so worried!"  
He stepped away from the stove, not wanting to burn her, "What do you mean? I've been right here."  
"I did what you told me not to! You were right! You were absolutely right! I should have never messed with time!"  
"Whoa, hold on, what did you do?" He gently pushed her off and had her sit down at her seat.  
"I went back! You were right, I shouldn't have tried, but you died and I wanted to save you! And then I was suddenly married to Peter, you had a husband too! But Erland got mad and went after my unborn son, so I went back again, and now Erland's dead!"   
Jett stared at her in shock, "What? Wait, so the reason you went back the first time was because I died?" Wendy nodded, "Ok, so you went back and came back to find out that whatever you did lead to the two of us getting married?"  
"You had a husband named Francis, and I was married to Peter."  
"Kay, but what ever it was that you did made Erland upset and he tried to kill... You were pregnant. Hmm."  
"Yes, but he tried to kill him, so I went back to stop anyone from dying, but then Sebastian killed Erland!"  
Jett nodded and handed her a box of tissues. She could feel the new memories burning their way into her head. Images of a court case, she and Jett leaving as soon as they could, she got her LPN, and her life was the same as it was before Jett died.   
Jett looked tired compared to how things had originally been with him. He looked like he hadn't seen a bed in days. His hair was also a bit thinner and he looked pale.   
"Jett, are you ok? What's wrong? You look sick."  
"Your memories will be a bit scattered and hard to keep up with. I suggest we go see Dr. Bonnefoy tomorrow, we'll find you something to help lessen the pain."   
"Ok, but something's wrong with you, please just tell me. I went back so I could save you, please don't let it all be in vain."  
"It's cancer Wendy. Lung cancer." The amount of defeat in his voice sent a wave of sorrow into Wendy's chest.  
"What? No! This is awful! We can fix this! We can go back! I can make things right!"  
"No you can't Wendy. Trust me, I've gone back so many times, I've tried every last little path I could. It's not going to work. I've seen Christen get hit thousands of times, but nothing I did could stop it. Maybe my death is just as unavoidable!"  
"But last loop you were happy. I know you can be happy again. You just have to let me try."  
"Wendy, no. I can't let you."  
  
The next day, they went to the physiatrist. Sure enough, her hippocampus was swollen. She managed to sneak away with a set of keys. She walked down the corridors and hallways. She caught sight of a name she knew. She opened the door and walked inside.  
"Sebastian?" She saw a red haired man look up. Her heart sank when she noticed that this was in fact a padded cell.  
"What~a do you~a want?" He sounded nothing like the once optimistic friend she used to know, more like a shallow husk.  
"I wanted to see how you were. Look, I'm really sorry about what happened back then. I can make it up to you! I promise! I can make sure this doesn't happen to you."  
Sebastian sighed, "You knew something~a bad was going to happen~a that day, didn't you?"  
She bit her lip, "Yes, but not to the extent that it got. I never intended for anyone to die."  
"Ah, I see. So it really was all~a my fault."  
"No! It was mine! How could you have known?"  
"Go away. I don't~a want to remember."  
Wendy inhaled deeply, "If that's what you want, but just know, I'll fix this! I'll make it all better! Just you wait."  
She returned to Jett and the doctor. She recognized the doctor to be Francis, but kept quiet.   
After the doctor's appointment, she dropped Jett off at their home and decided to visit Peter.  
She knocked on Tino's door. Tino answered with a small smile, "Wendy, long time no see. How've you been these past 9 years?"  
"Fine for the most part. I was wondering how your son Peter was doing."  
"Oh, he hasn't lived with us in years. You should find him at Ivan's place. That's where he works. I think he only serves men though, so they might not let you in."  
"Thank you Tino."  
"Be safe kiddo."  
Wendy left. She had gotten what she came for, so there wasn't much reason to stay, but Ivan's house was a difficult topic, why would he be there of all places?  
She knocked on the door. Ivan answered it. He looked better than he had then despite the 17 years it had been since she'd technically last seen him.  
"Wendy? Is that you? How've you been. Haven't seen you since we had our little chat."  
"Hello Ivan. Is Peter here?"  
"Yeah. I'll go get him. I'll give you an hour, but I want him back, ok?"  
"Yes sir."   
Ivan stepped out of view for a bit but quickly returned with Peter. Peter looked awful, like he hadn't been taking care of himself nearly as well as he should have.  
"Hey Wendy." He sneered.   
The two quietly walked down the block for a bit.  
"So, how've you been?" She finally asked.  
"Been Ivan's little whore, what's it look like?"  
"Crikey mate, how'd that happen? Thought you would have done better than this."  
"What'd ya expect? Times were hard on everyone and I needed some quick cash."  
"So this was your solution? What would your brother have wanted?"  
"What would he have wanted? No thanks to you, this was originally his job! I remember the day I was supposed to fuck you in front of Ivan's little camera. Should've let me done it, then Erland wouldn't have been touched! Should have just let Erland light fire to your dog! Maybe he'd still be here! I blame you for all of this, now if you don't mind, I'm going home!"  
"No! Peter, wait! I completely agree, this is all my fault. But you don't have to let yourself go like this! You could do better!"  
"Could I now? Why can't you just stop where you're at?! Why do you have to make my life worse just by existing? I'm going home! You should do the same before you make my life any worse." He turned around and walked back into Ivan's house. Wendy wasn't sure how she could have done any worse to him. He was too far gone at that point.   
She went home that night, and against her better thoughts, she had to go back. Maybe she could find something, no, anything to fix this.   
She flipped to the page when she and her friends blew up Niko and his son. This could be it. If she could fix things there, then Erland might never have tried to light Sydney on fire. Her brother wouldn't have started smoking. This could be her chance to finally make things better.   
"Alex found a bomb in Ivan's house. We decided to use it, but not long after we placed it in Niko's mailbox he came outside holding his son. I was more scared than I'd ever been in my whole life." Everything shook and faded, just like before. This was it, her chance to finally fix things.  
  
She felt Sebastian's hands over her ears. She watched as Niko stepped out with his son.  
"Niko! Get down!" She ran out of her hiding place. Peter saw her get close to the mailbox and instinctively ran up to the mailbox, where as Erland tackled Niko down. The bomb went off while Peter hugged the mailbox tightly. Wendy was thrown back and hit the ground with a loud snap as her back collided with the ground. She wasn't sure if she passed out naturally or if the world was just fading away again.

Wendy sat up. She was in a bed, her bed, but it was the same house she grew up in. She looked around, and sure enough, it looked just as she remembered it. She noticed that didn't have control over her legs, but that couldn't have been too bad. She was also pregnant again by the looks of it. She got in her wheelchair and maneuvered around the house, amazed that she still lived there. Her heart fluttered when she heard humming emit from the kitchen. She wheeled over quickly to see Jett.  
Erland looked over and smiled gently, "Morning honey. Nice to see that you're up early. I was almost done making breakfast."  
Wendy felt taken aback. Erland wasn't Jett.   
"Hey, where's Jett?"  
"In the hospital, he's been there for about a year now. You feeling ok?"  
Wendy felt the painful sensation of her new memories burning into her brain. There was another court case, Jett smoked a fuck ton due to stress, she married Erland this time, and Sebastian and Alex got married.   
Erland handed her a box of tissues, "Wendy! Your nose! Are you ok? Do we need to get you to the hospital?"  
"No, I'm fine." She nervously sat at the table. She wasn't sure what to think, "Hey Erland, can we visit Jett today?"  
"Of course." He got back to cooking.   
Wendy felt very disheartened as she ate. She realized that Jett was right when he told her that everything always gets worse. She had tried three times now, and yet things still weren't good. She wanted just once for things to be happy.   
Erland wheeled Wendy up to her brother's room. He was hooked up to all kinds of machinery. The heart monitor's harsh beeps were the only thing that told her that he was still alive. He looked like he'd aged so much. It was heartbreaking.  
"Jett?" Wendy whimpered as she was pushed up to his bed.  
"Wendy? Good to see you. How've you been? How's the little one?"  
Erland pulled up a chair and sat next to them, "She's good. Still thinking of names though. What would you suggest?"  
"Christen. That or Avery." Jett paused to cough, "But whatever you choose, I'm sure it'll be fine."  
Wendy sighed, "Jett, I'm sorry. This is all my fault. I went back, and you were right. I can't fix things can I?"  
"Erland, can you step outside for a moment?" Erland got up. Jett waited until the door closed, "Wendy, what did I tell you about going back?"  
"That it was dangerous and would only hurt people! But you died, I had to save you! But you were right, things only get worse."  
"I don't know what you did, but you have to promise me that you won't go back again. Things happened the way they did for a reason. If you do go back again, just try to let things happen the way they were supposed to, ok?"  
"But you committed suicide in the original world! I could just leave you like that! I had to save you!"  
"I'm alive now aren't I? Should that be enough?"  
"Of course not! You're connected to all of these machines! This isn't living! I have to fix this!"  
"No Wendy, you don't. You should stop where you're at. It's just cancer. Our brother had it, lots of our family members have had it. It'll be fine. I'll be ok."  
"Christen died! Do you not remember that?"  
"I do. He was paralyzed like you too. But we really shouldn't dwell the past. It's not healthy."  
"Jett, you're dying and it's my fault. I have to fix this!"  
"No. It's too risky."  
"Compared to this? You were happy once! I can do it again, just you wait! I can fix this! Change one thing change everything, right? I'll change it for the better, you'll see."  
"Wendy! Don't!"  
She wheeled her way out and had Erland take them home.  
"Erland, where do I keep my old journals?"  
"In our room under the bed, remember?"  
"Thank you." She got to their room and took out her journals. She rummaged through them. She only had two options, either go to the time Ivan tried to rape her, or the explosion. She sighed angrily at her options and flipped open the journal.  
"Yesterday Ivan baby sat Peter, me, and Erland. He made a movie with us, but then he wanted to make another." She could feel the world around her begin to shake, but kept reading regardless, "He told us to go to the basement and take off our clothes." She looked up as the world around her changed.   
  
"Alright, so this is the scene when Wendy gives Peter a kiss, but I've decided we'll change things up a bit." Ivan adjusted his camera a bit, "Wendy, I want you to take off your clothes."  
"Just one minute." She began looking around the room. Alex said that he found the dynamite in Ivan's house, so all she had to do was find it and make sure they couldn't use it later.   
"Come on back Wendy. We have a movie to make."  
Wendy found the bomb, "Do you want me to blow you up bitch? Crikey, let me get rid of this first!"  
"Hey! Put that down! You don't want me telling Jett about what a little shit you've been do you?"  
"Go ahead, but I'm telling Tino and Berwald that you rape their sons." She wasn't too sure what to do with it.  
"Wendy! Put that down!" Ivan walked up to her and smacked her. She dropped it and it rolled over to Peter and Erland.  
"Ooh! Candles!" Peter picked it up, examining it with his brother. Erland picked up a lighter from the floor and lit it.  
"Peter no!" Wendy called out desperately. The bomb went off and again, Wendy saw the world fade into darkness.

 

Wendy was in a white room. It looked fairly boring, and she didn't know where she was. She got up and examined her surroundings. There wasn't much, so she sat back down. She waited for the memories to come to her.  
After Peter and Erland's death, she'd been sent to the asylum due to how terribly she'd taken it. There weren't really all that many more memories other than the occasional visits from Jett.  
A doctor walked in, "Wendy, you have a visitor." He had a wheelchair with him, "What'd you do to your nose?"  
"Nothing, it just kinda started bleeding. So who's come to visit?" She sat down in the wheelchair and was wheeled out to the visiting room.  
"Why, your brother. Who else?" Francis smiled gently.  
Jett sat at one of the tables waiting patiently. Wendy smiled when she noticed that he looked healthier than he had in the first time loop.   
"Hello Wendy. Are you ok? Your nose is bleeding."  
"Jett, you know how you can go back in time to change things?"  
"I don't think I told you about all that, what'd you do?"  
"I went back try to stop you from getting cancer, but I fucked up. I fucked up so bad! Erland and Peter are dead and it's all my fault!"  
"There's a reason why I don't go back anymore."  
"Do I have any journals? I have to give it one last try."  
"No, but even if you did I wouldn't let you go back."  
"Fine. Can I at least read your journals? I wanna know what all's happened in this time loop."  
"I don't think you can go back using other people's memories. Since you can't, that's the only reason why I'll let you, ok?"  
"Ok, thank you."  
They spoke some more before Wendy had to be taken back to her room. The remainder of her day was fairly boring. She was allowed to go and hang out with the other patients but she wasn't all that interested.   
The next day, Jett came to visit her again.   
"Hey kiddo, here are my old journals. So, just wondering, is it possible to go back using other people's memories? Have you tried that yet? I know it's possible to go back using photos and videos, but other people have different perspectives on things, so it shouldn't be possible, right?"  
"Our abilities shouldn't be possible. But I don't think it will be possible."  
"I hate how everything changes the way it does. They say something as small as the flap of a butterfly's wing can cause a typhoon on the other side of the world. It's called the butterfly effect, so in a sense, doesn't that make us butterflies?"  
"I guess so. I never thought of it that way. But wouldn't it be better if there were as little butterflies in the world as possible? It sucks knowing how easily I can destroy people's lives. Have you ever met someone else like us?"  
Jett nodded, "Only one other person. His name was Alfred. He taught me most of what I know about our ability. You're right though. There should be as little butterflies as possible because when we go back, we can only make things worse."  
"Do you know what happens to the old worlds after we change things? Like, do they keep going without us?"  
"They simply fade from existence. That is at least how I've always seen things. They can't exist unless we let them."  
"Out of all of the different time loops, what one was your favorite?"  
"Wendy, that's too difficult of a question for someone who's lost track of how many times he's gone back. But out of the ones I remember I'd say this one. That's why I haven't gone back. There isn't really all that much I can fix at this point."  
Eventually, Wendy had to be taken back to her room. She flipped through Jett's journals. She wasn't too sure how this would work, but she had to figure out something. She found something and began narrating.  
"Due to the fact that I had to take Wendy to the doctor, I had to make up some time at work. Wendy gets along with Tino's kids as far as I know, so perhaps I can have them babysit her. If not I'll just have to bring her in to work with me." Wendy watched as the world began shaking. She was amazed that it was actually working, but she wasn't too sure when she'd be taken to.

She sat in Jett's car, being taken home from the doctor's. She looked up to Jett, he looked disappointed.  
"So what'd the doctors say?"  
Jett sighed, "They said you're like me."  
"That's good! I like you!" She kicked her legs lightly, "So, will you have to make up some work time?"  
"Yep."  
"Cool, can I come with you?"  
"I don't know kiddo. I was thinking maybe Tino could watch you."  
"But I want to go to work with you!"  
"Alright, if that's what you want."  
She gave him her usual cheeky grin, "Yay! You're my favorite person, and I don't ever want you to leave!"  
"Don't worry sweetheart, I won't." He smiled softly, "I won't be going anywhere."  
Wendy felt the word begin to fade again.

"Hey, Wendy! Get up! We got work today!" She heard Jett knock on her door. She sat up and looked around. It was her room, exactly as it was before Jett died. She got up and stepped out of her room. Jett's hair was still a bit wet from his shower. He made his way to the kitchen and Wendy made her way to the bathroom to take a shower.   
Her memories were exactly the same as they had been the first time with the exception of ever getting raped by Ivan. They blew up Niko and his son, Erland killed her dog, and she and Jett left without the intent to ever see them again. She sighed in relief, for she had turned everything back to normal.   
She made sure to clean up her face before leaving the bathroom to get dressed. She then approached Jett, who had conveniently finished making breakfast and was serving it up on their plates. He looked up to see her and gave her his usual calming smile, "Good morning Wendy. How'd you sleep?"  
"Fine, you?"  
"Had this crazy dream that a herd of koalas were trying to take over the world with a stick of Vegemite."  
Wendy snickered, "That sounds normal for you." She sighed, "So, remember what you said about how we could go back in time to fix bad memories?"  
He looked up, "Yeah. The blackouts. What brings this up?"  
"Well, I went back a couple times. You were right, it's too dangerous. Best to just stay where we are."  
"How bad did things get?"  
"It was awful. But I discovered something new, we can go back using each other's journals."  
Jett choked a bit on his coffee, "What?! Crikey! How?"  
"The same way as how we'd normally go back. That's how I went back last time."  
"Why'd you use my journals though? You have everything written down too, right?"  
"Not in that last time loop. Remember when you brought me to your work that one time when I was really little?"  
"Yes, why?"  
"There was a world where you took me to Ivan's house instead and originally he raped Peter, Erland, and I, but I went back and I accidentally blew up Peter and Erland which caused some problems of its own so I didn't have my journals. I used yours, and now we're here."  
"Wendy, I'm sure you've heard this from me before, but seriously, don't go back ever again."  
Wendy chuckled, "You've said that every time, but look. Here we are. You're happy and healthy which is all I was trying to do. I just wanted you to be ok. And I did it."  
"Well, I guess everything's ok. It's nice to know that you were able to find a path where everyone ended up ok."  
"The others don't matter. What matters to me is that you don't have cancer, you're happy, and alive."  
Jett smiled somberly, making a mental note not to tell her what the doctors told him.


End file.
